Yesterday, Doris Rose, "tagged" me (to use what I assume is blog parlance – orangeblossom?) with a challenge to write seven pieces of my story that she, Wicked, and Dizzy do not already know about.
Background: every year for the past three years I have participated in an annual event of mass insanity called National Novel Writing Month in which eager would-be fiction writers from all over the planet (and maybe some from the moon, judging from posted writing samples) put fingers to keyboard, pen, and palm pilot to write a 50,000-word novel in only 30 days. During the month of November. With Thanksgiving looming large and everything. Two years ago, I dragged WT and DR into the mess with me. Each year we have managed to produce fully-realized mini-opuses and this year we plan to do it again.
I assume these are the "stories" to which DR is referring. Or, it could also be our own personal stories, in which case Doris Rose will, I assume, correct me and I'll comply at a later date. And, I'm also assuming we post these to our blog, as per proper blogging etiquette?
So, without further ado because clients are clamoring for my non-fiction words, I give you:
Seven Things About My First Novel – As Thirsty As You Are – a political satire in 51,234 words.
1. One of the book's main characters is modeled after my father-in-law, due to his having spent quite a few years in Louisiana politics, including being a major player in what is known as the "Last Hayride."
2. The book's title is taken from a line in the Soundgarden song, "Burden in My Hand." Here, I use it to symbolize ambition, as in, you may be able to exist without food for weeks, but you can't exist without water for more than a few days. Truly ambitious people don't hunger, they thirst.
3. Another main character is modeled after Ann Coulter, of whom I am no particular fan. However, in the book, she's one of my fave people. So I gave her many fabulous outfits to wear.
4. A pit bull named Bubba Jake figures prominently in the story.
5. An entire chapter is devoted to discussing the difference between dry and humid heat, played out as a conversation between two truckers in a Kansas City diner.
6. Another entire chapter is likewise devoted to a discussion of the Lake Ponchartrain Causeway.
7. There are a lot of cocktail party scenes because I like to dress my people up and make them drink weird concoctions and do inappropriate things with other characters' spouses. It's the Jackie Collins in me. Just when I start hitting on something smart, someone takes their clothes off.
'kay, that's it!
Now, off to do some other work so I can watch the U.S. Open. I'm dying to see what everybody's wearing.