Please excuse this week's El Lamo-o Haiku Contest assessment.
I'm exhausted, y'all.
I've been sleeping just fine but working hard (and working out) and the icing on the cake of be-all-that-you-can-be was this morning's near vomit-inducing workout with my trainer. I guess she thinks I'm stronger and fitter than I am, and I guess I'm too embarrassed to relieve her of that notion. So the end result is the kind of stalemate that keeps me swallowing back hurl and spending the rest of my Tuesdays wishing for the succor of a box of donuts and my blankie.
But, nooooooooooooo. I'm now up to my eyeballs in work work. But before I go slug down a Red Bull and put on my game face, here's my short but sweet run down of the runner's up and winner's of this week's contest.
Being as I'm a huge fan of Hunter S. Thompson (RIP), I was immediately attracted to Czar's nifty ode to the inimitable Dr. G:
Whiskey/drug-fueled screeds
Skewer Vegas, politics:
"Ah, Dr. Thompson."
Then Troll chimed in with a haiku that confused me at first, but once the fog cleared, I laughed my ass off:
The Smug Zoology Student's Last Words. Unless, you count "Aaaarghhhhhh" as a word.
Let go! The book says
that you only hunt at night.
Illiterate Beast!
Troll's brilliant with titles, too.
Uncle must have gifted Aunty something real pretty because she allowed him back into this week's contest with another snappy 'ku:
Blind Daze
Sleet needled morn, he
crouches low amid the reeds-
to outwit a duck.
Sleet needled morn . . . damn. Wish I'd written that.
And then Buzz, whose play is intermittent but when he's able, he's spot on.
Left on desk - I'm sure.
Plan and place for everything.
Gone . . . damn you woman!
And the winner be: neck and neck between Troll and Buzz with Buzz edging Troll out by a hair. Simply because, well, I can so relate. And, I'm sorry. All women are like this, really, and I have no idea why. Blame it on our genetics. While you all were out thumping meat over the head, we were back at camp making things . . . orderly. Because we were bored out of our Cro Magnon skulls. We've come a long way since then, baby, but not long enough to divest ourselves entirely of this particular piece of our DNA. Deal.
So, Buzz, looks like it's your turn to host, judge, and perhaps even offer up a fabuloso prize. Can't wait.
