Dear Writer,
So sorry to have to tell you that, in spite of the clarity of the original assignment and repeated efforts after submission of your article (4 days late, I might add) to further clarify the assignment and provide you with additional, step-by-step-instructions and criteria to help you meet said assignment (and not your wildly WTF interpretation thereof), you are FIRED.
For it appears, yes, that you are an egotistical windbag who has grossly over represented your talent, thus wasting my time and delaying production by at least a week because I now have to scramble to fill the spot of a major feature for which there is no other recourse but a swift and silent death.
Sincerely,
Moi
Otherwise known as The Editor Who Never Wants to Hear Your Name Uttered in Polite Company Ever Again. Ever.
