Monday, October 17, 2011

Dead Men Walking


No one loves a good zombie saga more than I do, but is it just me or did last night's season two premier of Walking Dead seem just a bit flogged? Those "intense moments of sociological sparring" in between zombie threat and gag-me-with-a-spoon gross-out that have so many critics applauding just had me yawning and wishing I wasn't on hiatus from alcohol.

And when I get bored, I start watching for holes in the plot. Any little thing will do, but last night I didn't have to look too closely.

1. I realize the merry band of survivors have to hit the road in search of a safer place to try and reconstruct some semblance of normalcy, but who on earth allowed Daryl to do it on a chopper the size of a small jet engine that sounds just like one, too? Seriously. If stealth is a concern, then someone should have ixnayed his zombie-brained choice from the get-go. And, besides, who on earth can keep their arms up for that long? A chopper is a conceit, not a long term method of transport.

2. Yeah, yeah, we're supposed to believe for one second that the little girl purposefully left the spot under the riverbank where Rick hid her. Thus, sending the merry band on a sidetracked quest to find her, leading to all kinds of the aforementioned tense sociological drama, i.e., should we continue looking for her or save our own asses, i.e.e., are the needs of the many more important than the needs of the few? And do we beat the tar out of the little tyke once we find her for causing us such trouble? As far as I'm concerned? There's no room for children in the zombie apocalypse. Maybe the producers think so too, by the looks of the ending.

3. When trying to figure out if said tyke is still alive, Rick and Shane bean the brains of a walker, then cut open his gut sack to see if he'd recently munched on eight year old girl flesh. Ridiculous! What on earth would they have found to distinguish her from anyone else? My Little Pony? Barbie? I wanted to bitch slap those two but hard.

4. And if I watch one more program in which any character starts in with the why-me-Lording to a battered statues of Jesus in a bombed out church, I'm going to hurl.

The good news is, the previews for the upcoming season look like we're finally going to get to the meat of something interesting: A convergence with other survivors, evidence that a centralized form of control still exists, Rick finding out about Shane and Lori's stepping out. Anything to take us from the hermetically sealed world of Survivor Zombie Style into a broader, truly sociological examination of the only thing that really matters in such a tale: how thin and fragile is that veil between so-called polite society, order, and justice, and total anarchy? And which works out best for the human race in the long run?

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Where's Haiku Monday? Over at Rafe's. Guaranteed to be zombie free.

11 comments:

mega busy chickry said...

i thought if you got zombie blood in your eyes or in a cut or something it was contagious...am i wrong or wasnt that how it started with this series. Lemme tell you - that abused wife is getting on my nerves. She is like dragging 15 bowling balls behind you. The kid? i dont care. If they let the boy die, then only shanes baby is left. But i suspect they will meet up with a bad ass hunter who will have some awesome field dressing skills. There are only 2 people i like on the show -sheriff and redneck. and yeah - a chopper? get real. Id try and find a prius or something. vespas for everyone? Im sorry, but in a Zombie Poc? I would cut dead weight off me, get all kinds of low profile and start looking for better weapons. Like every compound bow in the country. Use your brains people! the zombies dont have much. Id like to see more "first blood" type solutions. They need us to help them write, i do believe.

moi said...

Chick-Chick: Better weapons, higher, defensible ground, with natural source of water. Maybe the Arctic. Go find some still-living Eskimos and a good pack of sled dogs. Or some Blackfeet and wily Mustang ponies out on the plains. Definitely NOT hang out in all that obfuscating primeval forest, siphoning gasoline and having my weapons snagged from my grip by touchy feely old dude. I like redneck Daryl, too, because he's laconic and smart and looks like he'd be fun to get drunk with, but the chopper nicked a few of those pluses off my Pros column.

Boxer said...

I thought the same thing.... isn't Zombie blood and guts bad for you? Kinda confuzzled when they decided to bath in it. Also thought finding a water truck was great, but pouring precious resources all over you? Not smart? Again, confuzzled.

your idea of looking for Barbie inside the Zombie for proof made me spit my coffee out.

As for the ending..... it was the only "shocker" in 90 minutes where I think they did little to blend last season with the current season. It felt like new writers were on board? Not sure. But I'm a sucka for Zombies and I love the scenery so I'm sticking around.

btw... I saw an ad for PROJECT ACCESSORIES?

moi said...

Boxa: Yeah, they're playing free and loose with the zombie blood in open orifices thing. Notice when Daryl pulled that just-killed zombie over the bleeding wound guy to mask their scent? I'da thunk some zombie goo would have oozed in there and turned him. Also, not only new writers, but new producers, so very astute observation. The show's originator, Frank Darabont, was fired.

Project Accessories—I know. What's next? Project Socks? Could be fun, though.

Boxer said...

I had no idea the Producer was fired/etc. Boooo. I rewatched the last episode of last season and I think it's amazingly written AND acted. Elegant.

Project Shoes? I know you'd watch THAT!

LaDivaCucina said...

Moi, I started to watch one or two of the episodes before and then had to do something else but taped the rest of them including the season premiere. No comment so far, as soon as I figure out where my taped shows are on our new TV, perhaps I can check this show out!

Post below: I LOVE the fur hat and knitted dress and arms, very cool. The fur hat would keep you warm enough to go sleeveless fo sho! In spite of the crap food, looks like the view was great. I hope you can come to one of Felix's events down here once, I was thinking of you at that last one (as you know!)

PS Gave you a shout out on my new post, your comment inspired me! Have a great week!

moi said...

Boxer: Ja. I don't know the entire story, but that was the general concensus: will this show be as good as it was last season? Also, Project Shoes? Yeah, buddy.

LaDiva: I soooooooo want to be a rich girl some day, just so I can fly all over the country to see my homies when they do something fun. I got such a kick out of your texts sitting next to the, what was he? gay Venezuelan journalist? Was he the one who plied you with all the alkeehol :o)? P.S. Doesn't moving suck? Well, not the whole new fabulous home part, but the logistics.

Buzz Kill said...

I like zombie shows, but I have yet to see this. Mainly because it's on the same time as Boardwalk Empire and I don't know how to DVR. I will make an effort to catch it on reruns.

And to weigh in on the zombie blood discussion, I always thought it was the bite that infected people, not the splatter (like this is factual stuff). I always tell The Pudge on shows like this to shut up (because he talks more then the Mrs while I'm watching TV) and just accept it. He doesn't listen, of course, but that's what I tell him.

LaDivaCucina said...

He was the gay Venezuelan fashion journalist from some paper in Miami to cover GLITZ tv and Project Runway Latin America, the event was tres cool! I think that night I was one of those silly people slurring my words...one prosecco, then white wine, someone gave me a rum and orange and then another and the event producer bought me a scotch on the rocks! EEEK! You can call me Miss Mix-a-lot, take two pain pills and don't call me in the morning!

moi said...

Buzz: What the hey? I thought all dudes knew how to DVR. Well, it was established early on in THIS show, that any zombie effluence that came into contact with any open wound or mucus membrane of an uninfected human would immediately infect said human and turn them into a brain craving freak. Sooooooooo . . . the producers need to stick with that fact, Jack.

Never got tucked into Boardwalk Empire, but I'm starting to really dig Homeland. One of my faves of the new fall season.

La Diva: I'm hung over just reading that :o)

Big Shamu said...

Have we talked about how the mother didn't go after her child? I lost my shepherd sarah for a brief time. I was constantly out looking for her, heartbroken knowing she was looking for me. I cannot FATHOM your own child gone missing and the mother didn't go kicking zombie ass to save her flesh and blood. Oh....sort of like Rick running miles with a bloody son in his arms on the vaguest of hopes that a rumored doctor could save him.

Oh yeah, give the blond chick a gun. If she wants to off herself in a quick and painless manner, it's not some dumb old guy's responsibility to keep her from doing it. Sadly it's not cold enough for her to walk off into the woods and freeze to death like the mother did in The Road.

None of them barely have sense god gave a lemon, except maybe the redneck.